Mixed feelings

Well, I prefer to post about exciting and positive things that the babies do but this one may be a bit of the good and bad. Carsen had a visit at the Doctors today regarding his eating. Nothing new, I guess. But over the last month he has really dropped off on his fluid intake. When it comes to feedings he chooses to completely ignore the bottle and only take food from the spoon. Yeah for the solids but not so good for the fluids. I can't get him to drink from a cup yet so it's kind of scary. That being said, the overall consensus is that it's finally time for Carsen to get a feeding tube. I have been fighting this for almost a full year. Some say it was a good fight but it's hard to accept that cheerfully. I can't help but feeling like we are taking a big step back. It seems like we have made it so far yet now it feels like we were just wasting time by putting it off. But I do realize we weren't wasting time totally because Carsen has learned to eat solids and that's a big deal. But it now feels like all that fighting and stress and the emotional roller coaster ride was all for naught. I don't know. But here we are. It seems to be the best option for Carsen now. We hope so. In the mean time he will likely be using an NG tube (through the nose) to stay hydrated and take fluids. I'm really not excited about that because having to be responsible for placing the tube is very frightening to me. But I guess it's just part of the job requirement now. I still have to say how grateful we are for All of Carsen's progress. He has overcome so much and defied so many odds and he's only 13 months old. Even though we're disappointed we know Carsen is still going to do way more than we ever dreamed or imagined! He's a strong little guy and we hope this just makes him stronger.

Happy Birthday Babies!

On April 13th we celebrated the babies first birthday! It was a wonderful day with much to celebrate. They have been able to accomplish so much over the past year. We feel so blessed to have such special little babies who have fought so hard to be where they are.

Carsen is doing really well eating solids now. He still has some trouble taking the bottle as much as we'd like him to. But overall he seems to be getting enough to keep him satisfied. Sometimes that means he gains weight and sometimes it means he just stays the same. His eating and weight gain are still a concern with the Doctors but not enough to doing anything drastic.

Carsen has been able to roll over from his right side for some time now. Well, good news is that as of a couple of days ago he has learned to roll over from his left side! That may not sound big to some but for us and Carsen it's huge! His left side has been the side there has always been some concern about. Mainly the tightness in his left arm and hand. We have tried to give a lot of attention to this area. Often it feels like he has maxed out his level of progress in a certain area. Then finally, much to our surprise he shows us that he is not done by any means. It does take time (and patience on my part) but eventually he overcomes or hits that developmental milestone and reminds us that he's going to get it. No matter how long it takes. It's always a huge relief to me because after working on something for months and months you start to worry that it's not ever going to happen. That maybe this is as far as he can go. What a blissful moment it is every time when he shows us otherwise! Then we start the process all over again focusing on the next big milestone. Trying to remind ourselves that its going to once again take time and just remember that eventually he will get it. Just DON'T GIVE UP!

Cierra is still our miniature locomotive. She just goes and goes and lets nothing get in her way. She is fully crawling and trying to pull herself up to standing now. She has two bottom teeth and loves to mimic and babble with you all day long. She's amazing!

I have to mention that Carsen is doing great socially as well. He loves to babble and talk as much as you'll let him. He also has two bottom teeth that are pushing through.

Anyway, as you see I could go on. Sooooo... today I am 32weeks along now and getting closer and closer to having a third baby in the household. CRAZY!! I am getting more and more scared as the due date gets closer. I don't know who to pray for more these days.... the twins, me, or the new unsuspecting baby who has no idea what they are getting themself into. Probably all four just to be safe. Or maybe just Brandon the way he keeps making reference to the fact that he's so close to picking up "drinking". Ha Ha